Spiders are bad. Umkay...

I just found out I'm afraid of big spiders - the big ones with the long legs. The small ones are cool. Sure I found a spider with a body two thirds the size of my fist in my bathroom last year (I used the bathroom on the other side of my hostel for a week after that) but you're supposed to be afraid of any insect or arachnid that big, right? Anyway this spider I saw had long extra thick legs and my skin crawled as I saw it scurrying out underneath the door. I took the most toxic thing I could find in my room - my deo spray - and sprayed all four sides of the door. That's probably bad for my health but it was worth it. Anyway I'm going home tomorrow for a two month summer break - yesss!! And little cat kittens are cute. But cats are mostly stupid. Dogs are smart though.

Stuff

Today I realized how attached I've become to my PC. My PC broke down last night and blatantly refused to start up again. I came back from the lab today all in-the-mood-to-lay-back-like and suddenly I found I had nothing to do. I couldn't watch Scrubs, I couldn't read a Conan issue, I couldn't find my laidbackness. Then I went downstairs and found people to talk to, and it was counfusingly surprising. Socially incapable animals like myself were never meant to have so much help being unsociable *sigh*

Anyway I can't wait for 6.60 Damn you IceFrog you sincere fool. And I can't wait for D3 Damn you Blizzard you arrogant genius.

A daydream

I'm a fool, and I'm drowning. Mountaintops and the bluest of blues. I can't sleep. I wish I was a song. Tomorrow is a dreadful place, it brings change. I see green everywhere. I look forward and all I see is a blur, I couldn't care less. A new place to escape to, and not just another place to escape to. Who knew words could be so magical, and never enough. An emerald in my hands.

Let it slide

Nobody is perfect. Like most ultra-cliched phrases its true. Anyway, I used to be something of a perfectionist. I like to think I've gotten over it. But then there isn't a really defined line between being a perfectionist and not being one.

I used to seek perfection in the games I played on my pc. I would reload until i got everything right. Then I found I had much more fun just letting things slide and accepting imperfections for what they are, not only while shooting aliens in the head, but in life in general.

Being a perfectionist or a control freak (one and the same don't you think?) has a lot to do with being lonely on the inside (and also on not finding satisfaction in your everyday life, but that's a totally different subject.) So when you find someone doing something some other way than you would like it done, let it slide and find someone to chat up :)

Its awn!!

Guitar drifting is beautiful. Andy McKee makes magical music with it. I first saw it on "August Rush" where the little guy starts playing without any prior guitar know-how (because you can't learn music from books, its out there - the Wizard says so)


















This time I have definitely bitten off more than I can chew

Blah

Water water everywhere
But not a drop to drink

Famous lines by a person whose name was a memory so brief I don't think it even qualifies as a memory. I could have easily googled it out but I choose not to. If you ask me there's too much information out there. I remember when information was precious. There used to be a certain snobbish satisfaction to knowing something the next guy doesn't. Now he just googles it out and pop goes your snob bubble. I guess being able to filter all that info and put it to good use would be the next edge. Thats evolution to you

Now about those lines, there are so many times they have changed to something else in my head, like 'People people everywhere - But not a single person to talk to.' ... or something else. I can't remember anything else they changed to right now. Typical. Oh well a post is a post

Don't look down

I'm scared of heights. I'm terrified of heights. If you are even slightly responsible for me being less than five feet away from the edge of a roof, I will launch a personal vendetta against you and pursue it with feverish fervor. Well maybe not but you get the idea :) Its what my nightmares are made of. Even as I'm writing this i can conjure up images of me being stuck atop buildings of structurally impossible heights, and me having to traverse super-thin ledges and the likes. I've been having these nightmares for so long I'm finding it difficult distinguishing them from real life memories. Last summer I discovered that I inherited this particular phobia from my mother's side of the family. Some might suggest therapy but me, I think it keeps me safe from all those ledges and edges so I think I'll keep it thank you.