Um...

I seem to generate contempt (directed at me) wherever i go. I don't know if its what i do or what i say or rather what i don't do or say. Or maybe its just me feeling responsible for any cause of anger or "unpleasantness" like i always do. And if its not, i wish someone would tell me what it is that makes me the asshole that i think i am. I guess everyone's just too distant to care or just too polite.
Then again, maybe its me not being able to cope with the cold cold world.
I guess i'm alone too much. I know i'm alone too much.

Laments of the outcast

People live life with so much ease. Everyone seems to belong to this world. They are exactly where they are supposed to be. They know exactly what to do at the right place and at the right time. And they are able to identify and decode the encrypted unspoken messages sent through some social gestures or whatever. But not me.
Me? I'm the odd one out - the extra - i am where i am because whoever put people in their places knew this place is as good as any for me. I'd be awkward anywhere. Maybe not in the south pole alone but he/she has a heart too. I am like the ugly gift you got from someone and you had to display it somewhere, anywhere.

Can you get high on music?

The ultimate escape is that moment in the song when you and the people around you with their instruments become one with the song. The euphoria that courses through during these few seconds is so intense you forget everything else. Nothing else matters. You lose all inhibitions. You don't give a fuck how moronic you look with that grimace in your face - no you just wanna burn everything up with your music.

That's my ultimate escape. I like to call it a natural high ^^
Cos its like getting high on ur own music.
I don't know about the guys but at least that's the way i feel.

First post

I'll probably be posting all my posts while dunking chocolate biscuits in coffee. Hence the title. Anyway i really don't write much, and i read very little. Fictional novels were a getaway from my course books in school. Sitcoms and computer games have replaced them now.

I guess all that made me the escapist that i am. I love being an escapist. I love the world i escape to. Its addictive. Its the reason i've been awake for the last thirty hours or so.
But its got to stop sometime - you can't live on fantasies. I've got some five hours before the real life phase begins again and i'd better spend those hours on sleep.

Look at all the "I"s in this post. I've (there it is again) got to do something about this.